(Edited among other things, to protect the innocent, namely Dhude and my contact info.)

The difference between assume and presume is that presume implies assuming beforehand and is regarded as the more careless between the two words, while assume is used more for formulating hypotheses. The prevalent use of assuming, therefore, is wrong (i.e. Maria Cristina is assuming), because it is not even an adjective. A more correct word would be presumptuous (i.e. Maria Cristina is presumptuous). In any case, it is assumed that Maria Cristina really isn't easy to get along with and that one is better off not knowing her at all.

Assumption also means taking on (i.e. assuming a role). It's also a feast celebrated by Catholics (today, in fact - thanks mej!). There also exists a less popular holy day called The Feast of the Presumption, which commemorates a minor martyr's fatal presumption. St. Nhoddy's last words were, 'I presume that those centurions are wimps because they wear skirts.' It is assumed by scholars that he died horribly.

To expound, let's assume that a certain biped, who we will name RYC for the sake of argument, is on his last day on his current job. He can suppose that he will be receiving a parting gift, and that is presuming (rather, presumptuous). Being a noisy bugger who won't shut up during office hours, he can also suppose that his absence will be felt, and that is assuming. Again, let's assume that another departing biped, who shall only be called Joseph Lao, supposes that he will be receiving a parting gift and also that his absence will be felt. His suppositions count as neither assuming nor presuming, but rather wishful thinking. They also border on assumed dementia, but that's already going outside of grammar and rather presumptuously into psychiatry (I know psychiatry, you don't).

RYC has already made several things clear, and one is that he will be going into the family business. Most people assumed that he will be going into his family's business, which is not the case. Rather, he will be going into the business of families, which can be summed up by the words wholesale and orphanage. If you assumed that I will sell families to orphans, then you assumed right.

The two years I spent with the team were easily the most memorable in my recent memory. It's not saying much because I have a condition which doctors assume to be amnesia. I can only remember the last two years of my life and nothing beyond that (except past lives). I can't, for example, presume to remember a Brent Uy even if people tell me that he only left the team last year. Still, assuming that I were to remember only two years of my life, I assume that I'd still choose this period with presumably no regrets, if only for the people who have made it special, namely Mr. Noya and the guard downstairs, who I presume has advanced gigantism.

I like to take this opportunity to thank everyone, not including the aforementioned two, for keeping the floor area beautifully useful. I like to thank the floor area for presumably harboring dust mites that I assume have contributed to the onset of my allergy. I like to thank myself for many things, which I will fully elaborate on with another email addressed to myself then printed in triplicate (I'm that grateful). If I failed to mention anyone (because I didn't, except for Mr. Noya and the giant guard), please don't take it against me and assume that I forgot about you. I didn't actually forget, it's just that I don't see you as a friend at all. You are cute in your own way though.

You can presume that I will miss working in the office. You can also assume that I will miss working with you. You can however know, that most of all, I will miss just being with you, but please also know that the world has grown smaller with communications technology:

<insert email here>
<insert cell number here>
www.callueng.com/bleargh

I presume that you will contact me, but don't assume I will reply when I'm busy selling families.

See you around.

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