George Lucas has a habit of releasing his Star Wars prequels in time with major roster changes in whatever workplace I find myself in. It's a thankful little detail as it gives me an excuse somewhat to get out of the office and do the unmentionable by watching a two-hour installment of a series to which grown men have been known to weep (I know I did after watching Episode 2).

Go watch Episode 3. It's the first prequel I enjoyed without afterward pitying myself for doing so. My opinion may not count for much, as I am a hopeless fanboy. I may not dress like a Wookiee for opening night but I'd easily bring a working lightsaber to a first screening. I do not know the names of all the characters, but I doubt that Lucas himself knows them all as well. I do know, however, that for a second, I learned how to appreciate a blue backside, thanks to Aayla Secura. Maybe I was expecting to shed a tear or two, but the occasional iffy line made sure that I didn't. I did feel a compulsion to cry though, but this was before the movie started, when I found out that Toy Kingdom was all out of working lightsabers, ruining the one remaining opportunity for me to wear geek on my sleeve. It's tragic, really, because I have plans of turning to the Dark side by killing every dust mite responsible for my allergy. I'll kill them all. They're dead... every single one of them... and not just the men... but the women and the children... too. They are animals... and I'll slaughter them like animals... I HATE THEM.

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